After hours · the office is shut

After hours


The record ends at Contact. When the office shuts, this floor stays lit: things to drive, play and practise, one door for the job search, and a shelf of smaller instruments. All of it runs in your browser, and none of it asks who you are.

G · The tiebreaker

For decisions that do not deserve a meeting. State the two options, flip, obey.

Heads is the monogram. Tails is the number. Assign them before you flip; the coin dislikes retrospective rules.

H · The unaudited accounts

Every figure elsewhere on this site is checked twice before it is published. These are the ones that got away: presented without evidence, contrary to stated policy, and certified by absolutely nobody.

Coffees consumed, year to date612
figure supplied by the subject and not agreed to receipts
Spreadsheet tabs open right now23
of which four are the same file
Figures checked twice before publishing100%
the only certified number on this page
Socks lost in the laundry, lifetime31
a material discrepancy, under investigation since 2014
Alarm snoozes, average weekday morning3
each one fully evidenced
Times "reconcile" was said in one meeting14
witnesses declined to comment

Auditor's opinion: adverse. The subject nevertheless appears to function.